Today while in the city I had to walk about 10 blocks in a section of San Francisco called The Tenderloin. Don’t even ask. It’s hella bad. lol But I had to laugh while walking thru that hood. I have told this story a thousand times to my friends, but I still think it is so funny. When my kids were growing up and learning how to take public transportation on their own I taught them survival tips. It was always “walk with confidence,” “know where you are going,” and last but not least “put on your BART face.” BART is our subway system here in San Francisco and if you are riding that system you will come in contact with every thug known to man. The definition of a BART face is basically a “DON’T FUCK WITH ME” face. I used softer words when the kids were little but now they know what I mean. And they are extremely urban trained and afraid of nothing! When my son’s ex-girlfriend moved in with me for a month I had to put her thru emergency training. After he broke up with her and she didn’t have a place to live I moved her in with me to start the healing process. She was to move into her dorm in one month so that meant I had a month to try to help her figure out her life. She made progress slowly but surely. The breakup was painful, as well as not knowing what her dorm co-op was going to be like, trying to select her Berkeley classes, worrying about tuition-student loans-and finances in general. I never even thought that urban training was in order. She is from Florida but since I don’t know much about her home town I didn’t have a gauge of what she has been exposed to. And I think I had assumed a generalization in that since she is black I just assumed she was bad ass. About a week after she moved in she told me that a friend that she made on Tumblr invited her to the movies and to spend the night. She told me the city which was on the other side of the bay, but near a BART station. I gave her the info on how to catch the bus to BART and what BART train to take. She froze. She was terrified of the thought of making this trek by herself. In fact she invited me to come with, saying that she was sure her Tumblr friend wouldn’t mind. I told her I was quite sure her new friend wouldn’t want a MOM hanging out for the night, so I gave her my crash course in figuring out the system. We talked about it verbatim and I showed her on my laptop numerous times how it was going to all go down. She still seemed nervous. The day came to make the trip. Instead of making her take the bus I drove her to the Fruitvale station. Before getting out of the car she asked “Is this where Oscar Grant was shot?” Umm……yes…….but……..you should be fine.” Yikes!! I take my kids to that station all the time. About 30 minutes later I get a text that she took the wrong train. I text back on how to get rerouted. About an hour later I got the sweetest phone call. When I saw her number light up on my phone I thought “on no!! now what?” I answered and it was her sweet voice telling me that she arrived safely and they were off to the movies. I asked her “so everything went fine when you got on the right train?” She answered, “Yes Jan!! I used my DON”T FUCK WITH ME FACE and I made it just fine.” Her voice sounded so young and sweet so to hear her say FUCK…..I just about lost it laughing. But……she now lives in Berkeley, she’s bad ass,……and no one FUCKS with that bitch!!
Since I am coaching young actors I am researching all sorts of information that I can share with them. I saw this today on Facebook and it looks like an amazing site (although it is for NYC.) We are all in LA but a lot of the info remains the same for both coasts, so I think all actors will find something of value here.
Sex without love is as hollow and ridiculous as love without sex.
-Hunter S. Thompson